Lvl. 14🪿
Bread Tax Collector
Operates a non-optional toll booth at every park bench. Payment accepted in carbs only.
03 — Goblins
Tiny feathered goblins.
With the deepest affection: Canada geese have main-character energy and zero customer service training. Below is a non-exhaustive bestiary of their preferred jobs.
Lvl. 22🪿
Sidewalk Supervisor
Stands directly in the middle of the path. Will not move. Is, in fact, the path now.
Lvl. 31🪿
Parking Lot Monarch
Has annexed three handicapped spots and a Honda Civic. The Civic is part of the realm.
Lvl. 47🪿
Forbidden Lawn Guardian
Sole protector of the corporate plaza grass. Hisses at HR. Hisses at the CEO. Hisses at clouds.
Lvl. 18🪿
Pond-Edge Bureaucrat
Approves and denies all duck applications. Files lost in the reeds.
Lvl. 9🪿
Bagel Witness
Has seen your lunch. Knows what's in the bag. Already counted.
A reminder:
They are not menaces. They are entrepreneurs. The grass is theirs. The sidewalk is theirs. You are simply a guest in the goose-state.